My father died when I was only 10 years old. My mother taught me how to survive both by showing herself as an example and by teaching me micro-business in my early age which I am so grateful because it carried me in so many ways. It probably the reason why in my early age I learned to provide my own needs in ways of handiwork. I was never a financial burden to my family.
Aside from my being "self-made-financial-stability", I also made myself emotionally and mentally stable. Any problem I had, I solved it myself without bothering them. I know I had always been in a compromising situation, but somehow, I managed to come out from them. I can always find answers to most of my questions. I can handle some things that are beyond my educational status. But when I got married...
When I got married, God changed me little by little everyday. God removed from me my being dependent to myself and taught me to share whatever problems I have to my husband. It was amazing how a very simple things that I used to know, and then all of a sudden I am caught in helplessness because I can't solve it. Then, out of despair, I would mention it to my husband... and then bam... the answer appeared. It happened to me a lot. My husband doesn't have to solve it (although sometimes he does). All it takes is sharing to him my problem at the moment. Sometimes, too, he suggest something, and my "self-made-stability" wouldn't agree to him, but in the long run, I end up following his suggestion. In the present time, I learn a lot. I am trying to agree on every thing my husband, and if it doesn't sound appealing to me, I can always voice out my idea, too. There's no harm in that.
God designed marriage in this way; Husbands have the voice... but... it doesn't mean wives can't open up or present their suggestions and ideas. They can, but the husbands got to decide which one to follow. It doesn't mean husbands are always right, sometimes they are wrong, too; but God will bless the decision of the righteous husband. And in the process of being a righteous husbands, their decision became wise and right, too.
In the case of unbelieving husbands, wives prays for their husbands to God that He may bless their husband's decisions and come to know Him. The faithful submission of wives will lead their husband to seek God.
"Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything." (Ephesians 5:22 NIV)