Sunday, February 1, 2009

Successful Marriage (part 6)

It is Sunday once again and we are still on Sermon Series of "Successful Marriage". Part 6 is still talking about the Role of Men.
On part 5, I shared 5 characterestics of the leadership of the husband, and today, I will be sharing the other 3.
6. The man is called to manage. "He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with proper respect. (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God's church?)" 1 Timothy 3:4-5 NIV.
This means that the husband is not the owner of his wife and children. This thought alone should affect greatly how he treats his family. If he knows that he is but a manager, he will never treat his wife and children like a slaves.
7. Jesus is the head for the sake of the church. "And God placed all things under (Jesus) feet and appointed Him to be head over everything for the church," Ephesians 1:22 NIV Jesus never thinks of what is good only for Himself but what is good for the church (His people).
8. The man should draw inspiration from Christ's leadership. Jesus came to serve and not to be served and gave His life a ransom for many. "...just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many." Matthew 20:28 NIV
.....a. The husband should be a delight to his wife in the same way that Christ was to His disciples. "Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers." 1 Peter 3:7 NIV
Applying this concept, where God calls the husband to live with their wives, the husband must live and be at home when he is with his wife. This means that his wife is his best friend. Having this in mind, the man must always make efforts for special arrangement for his wife.
.....b. The husband must instruct his wife in the same way that Christ did His disciples. The wife must be the husband's first disciple.
.....c. The husband must be a good example as Christ was.
.....d. The husband must make decision and delicate responsibility. In any organization, there is a need for a finaly authority and a final decision maker, and in marriage, the husband is the final authority.
* Decision-making is part of the husband's headship in the Bible.
..........- God gave the vision to Noah and not to his wife, to build an ark.
..........- God gave the vision to Abraham and not to his wife, to leave the land of Ur and settle in the land of Canaan.
..........- God gave the message of deliverance to Lot and not to his wife.
..........-God gave the vision to bring Israel out of Egypt to Moses and not to his wife.
..........- God gave the vision to Joseph and not to Mary, to leave for Egypt because of Herod.
..........- God gave the vision to make preparations to build the temple to David and not to any of his wives.
**However, since the man is the servant-leader, he must take into consideration what would be good for the church and family. This is the balance.
**At times, however, if the decision might cause a marriage to break apart, it is best to subject the decision process to pray and await God's voice.
In terms of delegation, the man must be able to spot enough to see the ability and gifts the wife has which he may not have or may be lacking in.
CONCLUSION: If both husband and wife fulfill their role in marriage, genuine oneness will be achieved.

Two more series to go for "Role of Men". Successful Marriage (part five) can be found at my January 25th post. For advance study, listen to audio-sermon at Living Word Christian Ministries.


infosoftz said...

just dropping by hoping for a link exchange!

Cherish Tulips said...

THanks for those nice advice which is helpful for newly wed like me and my lovely hubby!

Jacky said...

thanks for the comments. hindi ko nga alam kung ok na yung banner ko kasi d ko talaga macopy yung pic alone.

Beth in NC said...

Hi Grace! Thanks for visiting my blog! I hope you'll come back often! (You can receive pod casts from my pastor. The rest of our pastors/sermons are at

Bless you!

Denise said...


srinivas said...

very nice article

it is very much required at the present juncture

btw, can we give instructions or orders like moses or jesus gave to our family members :o

think, the days are not similar - it is getting changed, as per the rule of universe - but if anything is told with love and compassion, people would surely listen :)

have a wonderful time

i have a few words to share with you - can you give your mail id or mail me to

Lisa said...

This is so well researched and nice Grace. I just love all of your concerns. I feel a special connection with you because my grandfather who died had a second wife who was Filipino named Jing. I absolutely loved her so much. She was so sweet and had a similar smile to you. Keep doing what your doing Grace, I feel so inspired by your writing!

Daniel Ng said...

Can't wait for the last two part of this wonderful article, thanks and really enlighten me, God bless!

T T Tan said...

Thank you for sharing are amazing :) God Bless You and your family.

the donG said...

i agree. sadly a lot of men are quite irresponsible or maybe in one way not aware of their responsibilities.

sorry to have not visited your site for quite sometime. i had a busy weekend.

Gattina said...

I am for men and women being equal. This recepe works for me since 40 years !

Margaret said...

Hi Grace! Glad you enjoyed my blog. I was impressed by your perspective of God giving His instruction for action to the men of households, not their wives. When I became a Christian some 25 years ago, I wanted equal share in everything (ah...the influence of feminism), but God had other ideas. He led me to a Bible study on roles in the family and in His own household, the church. I must say that at the time I found this talk of submissiveness hard to stomach. But then I figured that God knows best and began to put His instructions 'to the test'. And guess what: my changed behaviour, i.e. being sweet and submissive (as much as I could muster, anyway) was influential in my husband's conversion! It was hard in the flesh but worth every tear I shed. And guess what, Henry did not become a tyrant. Giving him his rightful place in the household made his love blossom instead, and in time (and under God's guiding hand) he learnt to love his family as Christ loved the church.

I just wanted to say that submission is NOT a 'dirty word' but an honour and a sign of Christ-likeness. If we walk in the Spirit and put God's Word into action, we will be blessed beyond measure because GOD IS ALWAYS FAITHFUL.

Thanks for this post, Grace, and the valuable perspective of God's leadership through our men.